New Beginnings, Etc.

I was looking forward to January for several months. I thought, "Oh, January. The deep, cold, heart of winter. It will be the perfect time to relax, hunker down, and stop running around all the time like a damn crazy person." Yeah, not so much. January has been hectic as all hell. This hasn't been an entirely bad thing, but it has not been relaxing in any way, shape, or form.

First off, I am not pregnant. This is okay, for now. In all honesty, the timing ended up not being great for a pregnancy (more on that in a minute) and we're going to give it a few months before trying again. I'm not going to lie, we were a little sad about it, but I think we'll be in a better place later on in the spring. Plus, if I wait a couple of months, I'll qualify for paid maternity leave, an awesome fringe benefit of my wonderful new job.

And thus begins the tale of why January has been so hectic. Last Monday, I started my new job as Maternal-Child Health Nurse at the tribal health clinic where I interned the summer of 2009. This has truly been a dream come true, and I still can't quite believe I got this job. During my internship, the MCH Nurse at the time was my mentor, and I fell in love with the work as well as the community. She was leaving her position that fall, but I had another year of school left. We briefly talked about me applying as a LPN, but it wouldn't really have been workable with school, even if the clinic had been willing to hire a LPN for the position. Someone else, someone with a really great resume and background, got the job, and I told myself I would just have to try to come back once I finished a midwifery program. There generally isn't a lot of turnover for that position, so I figured it wouldn't open up again for quite some time.

My internship mentor and I had become very good friends, and we always talked about how great it would be to work together again someday. She finished up her own school this spring and is now a nurse-midwife, and had gone back to the clinic to head up a new MCH department. I thought and hoped that maybe someday we could work together in a midwifery practice for the tribe. Then she called me at the end of November and said that the MCH Nurse had submitted her resignation. I got my application in as soon as I could, and wrote the most gushing cover letter I have every written. I knew that I didn't have the work experience to wow anyone, but I did have the passion and desire to be doing that work specifically, in that community specifically, and I told them so. I interviewed on January 3rd and was offered the position the next day.

So I've been there a week, and I could not be happier. I still don't have a phone or a computer, but I'm also still orienting, so that's okay. The staff is wonderful and I share an office with my friend, who is also now my supervisor (and I realize that's not always ideal, but we are both talkers with a similar vision for the program, and I am more than aware that she's a brilliant person with a lot of respect in the community and many years of experience doing my job, so I'm happy to take direction from her). It's a 40-minute commute, but I'm not exactly sitting on I-94--my drive to work takes me up the Bayfield peninsula and it's gorgeous. I get to go to trainings and conferences--I'm going to the International Conference on Indigenous Children's Health in Vancouver in March--and meet all kinds of intelligent people doing incredible work. Like I said, I still can't quite believe I got this job.

Several years ago, I went a long time struggling to find any job that I could actually live on, let alone one I actually wanted. I liked my job at the Cancer Center, but it wasn't my dream. If anyone had told me four years ago that I would be in this position, I would have found it hard to believe. I don't know that I'll ever be able to take this for granted now. I hope not.

A Periodic Update

It's New Year's Eve. There was once a time when that meant I was going to be out whooping it up and carrying on, but those days appear to be behind me. Tonight I will be hanging out with my husband, along with Shane the dog and Wendy the cat. We will watch movies and eat hamburgers, homemade french fries and salads, share a piece of chocolate tiramisu from the oh-my-god bakery here in town, drink a bottle of champagne, talk about our hopes for what 2011 will bring us (namely, a baby, plus possibly my dream job), maybe play Scrabble, kiss at midnight, and go to bed. A lame, lame New Year's Eve by my mid-twenties standards, but our stamina is not what it once was, and the roads are incredibly shitty tonight anyway.

So I figured I have 893 days left in my project, and maybe I should check in, see how I'm keeping up with the list. Some of it is seasonal, some of it I haven't had a chance to touch. This is the rest of it:

1. Study mythology. Got a few books for Christmas, can't wait to dive in.
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6. Write a novel. I got it started, just need to keep going.
7. Read at least 30 new books. I've done 3 so far, with a stack waiting for me.
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13. Take at least ten pictures a month. November was a little short, but otherwise I've been using my digital camera more, much as I hate it. Still, documentation is good.
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15. Become skilled at IV starts. This has gone really, really well. I'm not expert yet, but I don't often need anyone to take over for me anymore. It's a deeply satisfying thing to successfully start an IV, even more so when the person looks down and says "Oh! I didn't even feel that."
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17. Become a parent. This is the biggie, and we currently have a box sitting in our living room, which contains a canister of liquid nitrogen, within which are two vials of sperm. When the 23-lb box arrived yesterday and I lifted it up to move it to the corner of the room, it occurred to me that it was the same weight as a healthy 9-12 month old. We have everything (well, not EVERYTHING) crossed that this will work.
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19. Buy as much food as possible locally. I've gotten more local produce from the co-op, Bayfield apples at AppleFest, 50 lbs of pork and 30-ish lbs of lamb from my parents' neighbors farm in the freezer, and our milk is always from the local dairy. It feels good to support the small local farms that are doing things right.
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22. Make different kinds of bread once every month. I have tried two different kinds so far. I'm not giving up yet, but it is possible that I may not become a master bread baker.
23. Study Anishinaabe (Ojibwe) spirituality. I'm starting out slow, smudging (which I love, love, love) and putting down tobacco when I pray. I have a lot left to learn.
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25. Enjoy my job as it is, without focusing only on moving on to midwifery. As I mentioned, there's a possibility I could be in my dream job within a month. If it doesn't happen, I think I'll be okay with that. There are parts of my current job that are a struggle, but sometimes I really love it.
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27. Organize my photos and photo albums. Done!
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29. Donate money to 4 different charities. As soon as things are a little more stable, I've got money planned for one of my favorites.
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41. No gossiping for 2 weeks. I don't think I've done this flat out yet, but I do know I'm paying attention to it more and doing it less.
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44. Develop a closer friendship with ---. We've hung out a couple of times and have plans to do more and get our families together too. She's great.
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49. Focus on the patients, not the workplace. I've gotten really attached to a number of our patients, and it makes it easier to do the job well.
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59. Drink tea 5 times a week. We're on a tea kick here in the Extremely Adequate household. The tea from the doulas is especially good and I'm trying to drink lots of it.
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66. Get to know my siblings and their partners better. I've been able to spend more time with my brother and his wife, which is always fun. There are fewer chances with my sister, but they'll be up in a few weeks.
67. Get to know Kevin's brother and his wife better. We all went out for dinner at Christmas. It was interesting and a lot of fun. I hope we do it more.
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69. Learn reiki/healing touch therapy. Taking a workshop next week!
70. Blog at least twice a month. Check. And just under the wire for December!
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73. Replace my non-stick pans with cast iron. 2 down, several more to go.
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80. Go to the Delta Diner. Done, and we shall return. If you ever find yourself between Ashland and Iron River at breakfast or lunch time, go. You won't regret it.
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85. Make it to 10 doula meetings a year. Haven't missed a thing since September. I love being a part of this group so much.
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91. Go to Madison at least once a year. Halloween. It kicked ass.
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97. Send out Christmas cards. Did it! And they were adorable, thanks to Kevin's creativity, and very well received.
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101. Recognize that having a list of goals does not make me an advanced person and refrain from becoming a pain in the ass about this. Fail. I'm a totally superior pain in the ass.

Happy New Year, everyone. Here's to a peaceful, hope-filled, amazing 2011.

I'm thankful this is my blog and I can be late if I want to.

I actually worked on Thanksgiving Day, so I didn't spend much time thinking on gratitude, because my job kind of depresses me and it was just like another day. But here is what I'm thankful for.
I'm thankful for the people in nursing school with me, because they are funny and supportive and warm and it makes a full day of classes enjoyable.
I'm thankful for the return of the Jell-O Pudding Pop.
I'm thankful Em and Ike came up to visit, because I hadn't seen them for four months and it was great.
I'm thankful Ike is fun and happy now instead of a screamy bundle of torture.
I'm thankful for the opportunity to live in a small town in such a beautiful area.
I'm thankful for the awesome bakery in this small town and the fact that I can get the best bagels I've ever eaten in far northern Wisconsin.
I'm thankful for my family, who are awesome and help us out as much as they can without making us feel bad about it.
I'm thankful for our new president.
I'm thankful for my friends. I'm not one to collect large numbers of friends, and the ones I do have are really important to me.
I'm thankful to be almost a quarter of the way through nursing school, and I'm thankful that once Kevin and I graduate, we'll never be desperately poor again.
I'm thankful for Kevin, because he is cute and charming and makes me laugh every day and has a strange fascination with the show "Bridezillas" and I can't imagine my life right now without him.